Earth Angels: Chapter Nine
Doreen Virtue’s just released book, Assertiveness for Earth Angels, published by Hay House, Inc has been touted as “an amazing gift of inspiration and practical knowledge.”
You can read an excerpt below:
Chapter Nine: Toxic Relationships
Earth Angels are “nice” people, with big, open hearts, so they can’t see when they’re involved
in toxic relationships. They excuse and minimize other people’s behavior: “He didn’t mean to act that way. He was having a bad day.”
Even more toxic is when Earth Angels blame themselves for someone’s harsh behavior: “if I were nicer [or thinner, smarter, richer, etc.], then he’d treat me better.” This is nonsense! Don’t take responsibility for someone’s cruel treatment.
Earth Angels tolerate harsh and even abusive relationships because they’re afraid of being alone, being in the wrong, or being judged. They force themselves to rise above mistreatment by disconnecting from their feelings.
Dissociation from your feelings does no one any good. It makes you out of touch with your physical body, which can lead you to overeat without realizing you’re full. It can also lead you to ignore symptoms that need immediate healing treatment.
Dissociation also keeps you from sensing your emotions. When you’re numb, you can’t hear your angels’ messages. Your sensitivity shuts down. since heaven’s messages come on the frequency of your attunement to energy, you need to be in touch with your feelings.
Earth Angels don’t know any better than to stay in a harsh relationship, because they haven’t had a lot of experience with human relationships. After all, they’re used to living in the higher-vibrational realms! this has led them to be socially awkward, and they may feel terribly lonely. So they allow any relationship to persist because they don’t want to be alone.
As an Earth Angel, you’re a teacher for peace. If you take the harsh treatment others dish out, how will they learn? Also, if someone’s treating you harshly, he or she is definitely doing the same to others. By your teaching him or her a better way to behave, you can prevent other people from being mistreated.
Clingy people are insecure individuals who latch onto whoever will acknowledge their existence by giving them attention. As a caring Earth Angel, you can sense that such people need love. The problem is that they’re a bottomless pit of neediness, which neither you nor anyone else can fill. This person is constantly texting, calling, and e-mailing you. He or she may even pop over unannounced for visits. This individual may have a misconceived notion of the degree of your friendship, and mistakenly believe that you’re best friends when you’re actually casual acquaintances.
— How this relationship affects you: This person has you looking over your shoulder constantly in an effort to avoid him or her. You start to feel guilty because you know that this person enjoys your company and feels he or she needs you, even though in a spiritual sense no one needs anyone as their source.
— How to handle this: It’s important for you, as an assertive Earth Angel, to always tell the truth with love. So you’ll need to summon the courage to tell this person that you’re quite busy with projects and need more space. This insecure person will likely feel wounded and take your words personally, but you can’t put your whole life on hold to coddle someone. You’re enabling unhealthy behavior by pretending to be friends. Perhaps there’s someone else who would genuinely enjoy this person’s company, and if you get out of the way by being honest, it leaves room for that new and more appropriate individual to come into his or her life.